Best Week Ever - 8/19/06

Here are my random thoughts for the past week, most of which was spent out at the Western & Southern Tennis Masters.


No matter what the temperature outside is, it always feels 15 degrees hotter when you're sitting inside a concrete block. Words to remember.

Watching Rafael Nadal is like going to see Talladega Nights: it sounds like a great idea in theory, not so much when you get there. Maybe it was waiting for him to serve while he was standing at the baseline, bouncing the ball off his racket...and then bouncing it again...and again...and again...and again...and then catching the ball with his hand and bouncing it...and again...and again...and again...and again...

I didn't know you were allowed to use a racial slur, and then claim it was a silly word you made up. I'll have to ask George Allen how that whole thing works (and don't you know that if it was Howard Dean that said it, CNN would have created a 'Macacagate' graphic to go under their cease fire clock).

No matter how many points the Bengals put up in the preseason, it still doesn't change the fact that they can't stop the run. And that's why they're going to have a losing record this year.

Andy Roddick is hunky. Seriously, I'm a heterosexual male, but I can't shake the feeling that my dating history would be radically different if I had his genes. Now his brain...not so much. And for the 1000th time, Andy Murray is Jon Heder's twin brother.

Teenage girls are dressing sluttier every year. Someone should seriously come up with a rating system or index to chart this.

There are a ton of attractive women at tennis tournaments. I'm not saying these are related, just making observations.

Speaking of young girls, good to see that the Thai police may or may not have caught the killer of Jon Benet. That's definitely the most important thing going on in this world. In other news, the president broke the law.

(side note: congratulations Mr. Ramsey, you and your late wife are no longer the prime suspects in your daughter's murder. It still doesn't change the fact that you are one of the creepiest people on the planet, and sort of brought this all on yourself by not cooperating with police, and like OJ a good portion of society still thinks you did it. But for now, hey, take a deep breath.)

Roger Federer tanked his match. There, I said it.

The Reds are done. It hasn't happened yet, but it's coming.

Indian tennis fans rock. No one gets crazier for a match, let alone a doubles match, than they do when Leander Paes is out there. Seriously, this makes me want to take a two week sports tour of India. Go see a cricket game or two, some badminton, they're wild.

I missed it, has anyone been arrested this week for saying something that might be construed as a possible inkling that they might begin thinking about writing up a plan to take something unusual on a plane that could be mistaken for something that looks kinda like a bomb?

Dear Kate Hudson,

I'm available. I know it's bad form to pursue someone before their divorce is final. I'm just putting it out there. You know, for future reference. Just in case.