Having a Republican convention at a place called the Xcel Energy Center is definitely an oxymoron in a sense. From what I understand this has been the lowest attendance for the Republicans in a long time – in both delegates and diversity.

For those of you who just couldn’t stay awake through the whole thing, let me give you a brief synopsis of in activities.

Day 1:

The comedy stylings Laura Bush and Cindy McCain appeared at the convention and did their famous parody/spoof of, “People who seem concerned about hurricane victims”.

Cindy wore something from the “Linda Evans: Dynasty” collection and Laura Bush wore white on Labor Day. Mr. Blackwell help me out here – is it no white on Labor Day or after Labor Day?

No Dick Cheney sightings to report.

Day 2:

President Bush made a brief appearance via the talkin’ picture tubes. He couldn’t be there in person because of, “presidential stuff”.

Fred Thompson woke up and is angry. NO ONE should disturb Fred’s nap. NO ONE.

Joementum comes into play and acts like he is still a member of the Democratic party. Wrong Joe. He has a few choice words about Obama. Just 2 years ago Joe was best buddies with Obama. I guess he is mad at Barack Obama now that he doesn’t need him anymore.

No Dick Cheney sightings to report.

Day 3:

Rudy speaks. 9/11, noun, verb.

The VP nominee speaks. She mentions things about hockey and bashes Obama for community service. I guess the Republicans DO NOT believe in giving back to the community.

And what did Joe Biden think about the speech? In his words:

"I was also impressed by what I didn't hear in the speech. I didn't hear a word--didn't hear the phrase middle class mentioned, I didn't hear a word about health care. I didn't hear a single word about what we're going to do about the housing crisis, college education, all the things that the middle class is being burdened by now.

"I didn't hear the words Afghanistan or Pakistan where al-Qaeda lives and bin Laden resides, so I also, you know, there was a deafening silence about the hole that the Republicans have dug us into and any specific answers to how the McCain-Palin ticket is going to get us out of that hole."

No Dick Cheney sightings to report.

Day 4 – TONIGHT!

Can you feel the {yawn} excitement {yawn}? Excuse me, I am falling asleep just thinking about it. Tonight is the night that John “Maverick in his own mind” McCain accepts the nomination. I am guessing we will hear some POW stories, how he hates Democrats, and ObamaObamaObama. Joe Biden will get to use his same remarks tomorrow.

If you have trouble sleeping this may be what you need.

Dick Cheney sighting? Hold me, I’m scared!

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